07 May 2013
Buddhist nun Pema Chodron teaches, “Enlightenment is not something we’re going to achieve after we follow the instructions, and then get it right. In fact, when it comes to awakening the heart and mind, you can’t ‘get it right.’” Images of well-known souls such as the Buddha, Confucius and Jesus come to mind when we think about “enlightenment.” These are people who reached a high...
12 Apr 2013
Have you encountered times in your marriage where one or both of you wanted to have sex, but there just wasn’t time or energy for it? I know that we used to face this realization way too often in our own marriage. We would exchange some “indications” earlier in the day that we were looking forward to an intimate evening. However, after a longer-than-usual time...
20 Mar 2013
If you’ve ever been on a luxury cruise or vacation where you ate more sweet and rich foods than you usually do and were less active than you normally are, you probably came home feeling rested and relaxed but with a few extra pounds, too! Post-vacation, you may have started a new diet and exercise routine to work off the weight you picked up to...
05 Mar 2013
While the diversity in the couples I work with is infinite, one complaint rings true across all cultures: couples who describe themselves as loving, trusting and caring complain that their sex lives have become dull and devoid of eroticism. I was honored to have been invited as one of three experts for the special TED talk for Valentine’s Day. In this talk, I explore: Why...
13 Feb 2013
In the beginning of almost every relationship, we’re totally irresistible to each other. We’re perfect in each other’s eyes. We do special things for each other like leave love notes and set up special surprise dinners for our loved one. We can’t get enough of each other. We talk all the time. We tell each other anything and everything. We’re totally open, curious, and willing...
04 Feb 2013
Cindy is bored with her marriage. She’s embarrassed to admit it because so many of her friends are in relationships that are conflict-ridden and have been destroyed by cheating. She feels sure that her husband Paul is faithful to her, and she knows he loves her. But, she really misses the way things used to be for them. Before kids. Before home maintenance. Before demanding...
01 Feb 2013
Shortly after we were married, we went to India and spent our honeymoon in monasteries and ashrams. We also had a private meeting with the Dalai Lama at his residence in McLeod Ganj, in the foothills of the Himalayas. As Ed recalls: After some thirty minutes of talking with him, I was feeling so moved by this gentle and loving man that I didn’t want...
26 Jan 2013
Hurtful words in a relationship can be like a drop of red dye in a glass of water that turns the whole glass pink. What starts out as a slip of tongue, a small slight from one person to another, sets a process in motion that slowly (or quickly) permeates a relationship and begins to define its tone. It’s easy to think criticism is a...
17 Dec 2012
Whether it shows up in money arguments, sexual tension or other ways, stress often comes to the forefront during the holidays. A conscious loving set of solutions can help you overcome intimacy challenges at this time of year. Here are some of the most common issues we’re heard over the years and the practical shifts you can create to enjoy your holidays to the max.
03 Dec 2012
It’s the most wonderful time of the year . . . Or so the song goes. When you have a tendency to get jealous, the holidays can be an especially UN-wonderful and upsetting time of the year. Yes, there may be plenty of festivities, good food, and presents, but there are also a lot of triggering situations.