Deepening Love


5 Ways to “En-Lighten Up” Your Relationship
07 May 2013

5 Ways to “En-Lighten Up” Your Relationship

Buddhist nun Pema Chodron teaches, “Enlightenment is not something we’re going to achieve after we follow the instructions, and then get it right. In fact, when it comes to awakening the heart and mind, you can’t ‘get it right.’” Images of well-known souls such as the Buddha, Confucius and Jesus come to mind when we think about “enlightenment.” These are people who reached a high...

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The Love Diet
20 Mar 2013

The Love Diet

If you’ve ever been on a luxury cruise or vacation where you ate more sweet and rich foods than you usually do and were less active than you normally are, you probably came home feeling rested and relaxed but with a few extra pounds, too! Post-vacation, you may have started a new diet and exercise routine to work off the weight you picked up to...

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Mating in Captivity: The secret to desire in a long-term relationship
05 Mar 2013

Mating in Captivity: The secret to desire in a long-term relationship

While the diversity in the couples I work with is infinite, one complaint rings true across all cultures: couples who describe themselves as loving, trusting and caring complain that their sex lives have become dull and devoid of eroticism. I was honored to have been invited as one of three experts for the special TED talk for Valentine’s Day. In this talk, I explore: Why...

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What’s Your Swoon Quotient*?
28 Feb 2013

What’s Your Swoon Quotient*?

I came back from errands recently and met Gay in the kitchen. When we hugged and kissed hello I noticed a wave of bliss/streaming/expansion rush up the front of my body and take me into light swooning. After 33 years of being together, I felt delighted that swooning still occurs regularly and reliably. I wanted to immediately clone the pathway to share with others. How...

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74 Simple Things to Brighten Your Partner’s Day
20 Feb 2013

74 Simple Things to Brighten Your Partner’s Day

In a recent giveaway I had for my Marriage Time newsletter subscribers (sign up here for free so you don’t miss the next one), I asked this question: What is one simple thing I can do to brighten my spouse’s day today? I received dozens of responses back, and I was really touched and impressed by some of the ideas. So, I filtered through all...

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3 Ways You May Have Stopped Being an Irresistible Invitation to Love
13 Feb 2013

3 Ways You May Have Stopped Being an Irresistible Invitation to Love

In the beginning of almost every relationship, we’re totally irresistible to each other. We’re perfect in each other’s eyes. We do special things for each other like leave love notes and set up special surprise dinners for our loved one. We can’t get enough of each other. We talk all the time. We tell each other anything and everything. We’re totally open, curious, and willing...

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A Simple Way to Deepen Love
11 Feb 2013

A Simple Way to Deepen Love

I’m hearing Aretha in my head, wailing the anthem that carried many women into a new paradigm in their personal and professional relationships. I’m seeing images of Gloria Steinem from her recent HBO documentary, giving her interviewers and deriders her full attention and straightforward responses. And I’m appreciating all the interactions I’ve had with Gay over the years that built this solid, yet flexible structure....

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Love the One You’re With
26 Jan 2013

Love the One You’re With

I was re-listening to Arielle Ford’s interview on the Lifetime Love Affair Summit about “How to Wabi Sabi Your Relationship”, based on her new book, Wabi Sabi Love. For those of you who missed it, Wabi Sabi is the ancient Japanese art of seeing the perfection in the imperfect. The Quest for Perfection or How to Commit to Misery for Life We get so obsessed...

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How Can Your Relationship Become a Garden?
18 Jan 2013

How Can Your Relationship Become a Garden?

I attended a lecture recently by Robert Ketchell, a lifetime practitioner of Japanese gardening. I was immediately captivated by his opening statement that gardening is an underrated skill with vast implications for healing our relationships with each other and the planet. He then went on to outline the principles of Japanese gardening that can be adapted to Western gardens, such as arranging empty space, using...

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Take 15 Minutes Each Day to Just be a Couple
14 Jan 2013

Take 15 Minutes Each Day to Just be a Couple

Trust me, I know how busy your life as a married couples can be. With work, family, extracurricular activities, exercise, kids, cooking, household chores and all of the other tasks we have to complete each day, it seems like there’s no time for anything else.



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